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Timestamps are as accurate as they can be but may be slightly off. We encourage you to listen to the full context.
In this powerful year-end planning episode, Mel Robbins shares a transformative ritual she and her husband have practiced for 22 years to create clarity and intentional growth. (02:42) Through six research-backed questions, Mel guides listeners to look backward at the past year's highs and lows before setting direction for the future. She emphasizes that an amazing year doesn't happen by chance—it happens by choice, and proper planning requires understanding where you're starting from. (07:07) The episode includes Mel's personal reflections on 2024, revealing both struggles with self-care and incredible professional achievements, including launching a new protein company called Pure Genius. (69:59)
Mel Robbins is a bestselling author, motivational speaker, and host of the number one most followed podcast on Apple Podcasts. Her book "The Let Them Theory" has been read by over 8 million people worldwide and became a global phenomenon in 2024. She has developed research-backed frameworks for personal development and recently co-founded Pure Genius, a protein company focused on solving nutrition gaps for busy professionals.
Mel emphasizes that you cannot create effective directions for where you want to go unless you know where you're starting from. (07:07) Research from UC Irvine and Penn State shows that processing difficult emotions and experiences rather than avoiding them actually frees you from their weight and helps you move forward more effectively. This backward look isn't about dwelling on the past—it's about extracting wisdom and understanding patterns that will inform better decision-making in the future.
Rather than relying on memory, Mel suggests using your phone's camera roll to identify the real highs and lows of your year. (06:37) Your photos reveal patterns you might have forgotten—times when you looked energized versus exhausted, moments of connection versus isolation. This visual data helps you make more accurate assessments of what actually happened versus what you think happened, leading to more informed planning for the coming year.
This strategic business framework works powerfully for personal planning. (49:56) Identify what you need to stop doing (habits that drain you), what you want to continue (what's working well), and what you want to start (new directions for growth). Cal Newport's research on productivity shows that real progress comes from subtraction before addition—focusing on what truly matters rather than simply adding more to your plate.
When your goals emerge from personal reflection rather than external pressure, they carry intrinsic motivation that sustains action. (20:14) If you see photos of yourself sitting on the bench instead of participating in family activities, the goal to get healthier becomes deeply personal rather than something you "should" do because experts say so. This personal connection creates the internal fuel needed to actually follow through on changes.
Mel discovered that her best weeks happened when she had simple, repeatable systems in place—like meal prepping her "swamp soup" for the week. (43:50) The key insight is that structure isn't restrictive; it's liberating. When basic systems handle routine decisions (like what to eat), you free up mental energy for more important choices and feel more in control of your daily experience.