How to Design Your Life (A Full Step-by-Step Process)
Timestamps are as accurate as they can be but may be slightly off. We encourage you to listen to the full context.
Podcast Summary
In this transformative episode, Mel Robbins sits down with Professor Debbie Millman, who has taught life design at the School of Visual Arts for 15 years, to reveal a proven three-step method for designing your dream life at any age. Drawing from Milton Glaser's legendary exercise that mysteriously changed students' lives for 50 years (10:09), Millman guides listeners through the powerful process of writing a detailed essay about their life exactly 10 years from today—from the moment they wake up to when they close their eyes to sleep. The conversation explores how to break free from the trap of "probability thinking" and instead dwell in pure possibility (21:37), while addressing common obstacles like fear of wanting "too much" and the paralyzing question "what if it doesn't work out?" (40:29). Complete with an exclusive free workbook designed by Millman herself, this episode delivers both inspiration and actionable tools for anyone ready to stop waiting for opportunity and start creating the life they truly want.
Speakers
Mel Robbins (Host)
New York Times bestselling author and internationally recognized speaker, creator of The Mel Robbins Podcast (one of the world's most successful podcasts). As she mentions, she built her media empire from Boston, proving you can create anything from anywhere.
Professor Debbie Millman
Professor at School of Visual Arts for 15 years, author of seven bestselling books, and legendary designer responsible for 20% of grocery store packaging you see today. Fast Company calls her one of the most creative people in business and one of the most influential designers in the United States.
Key Takeaways
Travel Ten Years Forward: Design Without Limits
Start with "It is October 29, 2035. I opened my eyes and..." then describe your ideal day from morning to night—where you live, who you're with, what you do for work, how you feel. This isn't about what's probable; it's about what's possible when you remove fear and self-imposed limitations. (19:41)
Make It Until You Make It
Replace "fake it 'til you make it" with intentional creation. When you make it until you make it, you're not pretending—you're actively designing and building toward your vision through deliberate daily actions. This transforms you from a passive dreamer into an active architect of your future. (65:28)
Declare Your Dreams to Amplify Possibility
Reading your ten-year vision aloud to others creates transformational power. When students share their essays, nobody responds with skepticism—people cry from being moved by another's courage to dream big. This declaration integrates your intentions into conscious action. (12:30)
Use Jealousy as Your North Star
When stuck or unclear about what you want, ask: "Who am I jealous of? What do they have that I really want?" Jealousy reveals hidden desires and provides concrete clues about what you should try for. It's your inner compass pointing toward unfulfilled potential. (61:16)
Hope Must Outweigh Fear to Create Movement
Before pursuing any dream, examine: "Do I have more hope for this possibility happening than I do fear?" If fear dominates, you'll stay paralyzed. When hope surpasses fear, you're ready to act. Remember—determining something is impossible before trying is self-sabotage disguised as realism. (39:42)
Statistics & Facts
- Professor Debbie Millman has been teaching a course on life design at the School of Visual Arts in New York City for 15 years. (01:54)
- Fast Company calls Millman one of the most creative people in business and one of the most influential designers in the United States, with her having had a hand in designing about 20% of the packaging you see on grocery store shelves. (02:25)
- Milton Glaser taught his life design exercise class for 50 years, stating that virtually not a week went by when a former student wrote him saying "everything came true" from their life design essay. (10:49)
