Ditch Your Money Trauma So You Can Live an Abundant Life (with Shannah Game)
Timestamps are as accurate as they can be but may be slightly off. We encourage you to listen to the full context.
Podcast Summary
This NerdWallet Smart Money podcast episode explores the critical relationship between our emotions and financial behaviors, featuring guest Shannah Game, author of "Unraveling Your Relationship with Money." The conversation begins with deep dive into how childhood experiences shape our money beliefs by age seven, and how these unconscious patterns continue to influence our spending, saving, and earning decisions as adults. (03:36) The episode then shifts to a practical listener segment with Katie, a 34-year-old museum worker transitioning to a lower-paying job while moving in with her partner. Katie's situation illustrates the challenges many face when trying to balance emergency savings with retirement contributions on a tight budget, especially when starting their financial journey later in life. (21:07)
• Main themes: Understanding the psychological roots of financial behavior, practical strategies for building savings and investing on limited income, and navigating major life transitions while maintaining financial healthSpeakers
Sean Pyles
Co-host of NerdWallet's Smart Money podcast and founder of a financial planning firm. Sean got married this year and is passionate about building financial communities and helping people achieve their money goals through practical education and support.
Elizabeth Ayoola
Co-host of NerdWallet's Smart Money podcast who brings personal experience with financial transformation, having overcome her own money challenges to build a healthier relationship with finances. She emphasizes the importance of making financial management enjoyable and sustainable.
Shannah Game
Host of the "Everyone's Talkin' Money" podcast and author of "Unraveling Your Relationship with Money: Ditch Your Money Trauma, So You Can Live an Abundant Life." Game specializes in helping people understand the emotional and psychological aspects of their financial behaviors through inner work and practical strategies.
Key Takeaways
Your Money Story Forms by Age Seven
According to Shannah Game, our fundamental money beliefs, habits, and behaviors are largely established by age seven based on childhood observations of how our parents handled finances. (06:36) This early programming continues to unconsciously drive our adult financial decisions, from salary negotiations to spending patterns. Game emphasizes the importance of exploring these early memories to understand current money behaviors. For example, someone who witnessed parents fighting about money might develop anxiety around financial discussions, leading them to avoid budgeting or investment planning altogether. Understanding these deep-rooted patterns is the first step toward creating healthier financial habits and achieving long-term goals.
Use Your Body as a Financial Stress Indicator
Game introduces the concept of somatic awareness for money management, explaining how our bodies provide crucial signals about our financial stress levels. (08:25) Physical reactions like racing heart, sweaty palms, or the urge to flee when looking at bank statements are indicators that deeper money beliefs are being triggered. Rather than judging these reactions, Game recommends pausing to explore their origins and addressing the underlying fears. This body-awareness approach helps people identify when childhood money trauma is influencing present-day decisions, allowing them to respond more consciously to financial situations rather than react from old patterns.
Weekly Money Dates Create Alignment
Game advocates for fifteen-minute weekly money dates as a practical tool for aligning spending with future goals. (12:16) During these sessions, individuals review the previous week's spending and upcoming expenses, asking whether their financial choices support their long-term vision. This regular practice helps bridge the "goal gap" between what people want and what they actually do with their money. The key is building spending plans that include meaningful activities rather than cutting out everything enjoyable, making the financial journey sustainable and aligned with personal values.
Start Retirement Savings Even with Small Amounts
Katie's situation demonstrates that starting retirement savings with small contributions is worthwhile due to compound interest, even when money is extremely tight. (27:29) Financial experts recommend building a small emergency fund first (around $1,000), then simultaneously contributing to retirement while growing the emergency fund. For someone earning $16 per hour, even $25 monthly contributions matter because time and compound growth work in their favor. The discipline of regular saving is as valuable as the amount itself, and contribution levels can increase as career situations improve.
Use the 50/30/20 Budget Framework for Financial Structure
The 50/30/20 budget provides a practical starting framework for managing finances, especially during income transitions. (26:04) This allocates 50% of income to needs (housing, groceries, utilities), 30% to wants, and 20% to savings and debt payments. When this exact split isn't feasible due to high living costs, people can adjust to 60/20/20 or other variations. For Katie's situation, this framework helps organize her new budget with reduced income while ensuring progress toward multiple financial goals simultaneously rather than choosing between emergency savings and retirement contributions.
Statistics & Facts
- By age seven, children have developed their fundamental viewpoints on money, including habits, behaviors, and beliefs that will influence their adult financial decisions. (06:36) Shannah Game shares this research to emphasize how early childhood experiences with money create lasting patterns in our financial lives.
- Katie earned $45,000 when she started her museum job two years ago and worked up to $52,000 before transitioning to a $16-per-hour position at a plant nursery. (21:01) This represents a significant income reduction that illustrates the financial challenges of career transitions and geographic moves.
- Katie has approximately $9,000 total in retirement savings across two 403(b) accounts, with just under $7,000 in her current account and just over $1,000 in a previous employer's account. (28:04) This demonstrates the reality of starting retirement savings later in life and the importance of consolidating accounts for better management.
